Time to retire? May be not!

So we went on a rather sudden trip to India in November. Among the many other adventures, a couple of them were these two. While just doodling around one day which is Chica's favorite pastime, this is what she came up with. I think its time to retire from this parenting gig when your 5 year old has the circle of love and life this clear in her head.

Or may be not because if your 7 year old comes up with this when asked to do his homework, retirement would have to wait some!

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You know you are raising a geography geek when ...

- Flags of countries suddenly appear on your house walls as do maps to a beach you visited last weekend.

- He/she takes bites of chapatis in a way to make shapes of Mexico and South America out of it.

- Whose eyes become like big round saucers when you tell him that he has been to Kasauli, the mountains where are the part of the Himalayan Range and he screams, "You mean I have been to the GREAT HIMALAYAS!"

- Holds the following conversation with an 11 year old Korean boy from his Tae Kwon Do class when he meets him at the park :

V - Are you from South Korea?

A - Yes

V- Its that country behind the Great Himalayas, on the east of China, right?

A - I think so!

V - You know I have been to the Great Himalayas! Had I climbed to the top, I would have been able to see South Korea! Yeah right, Dude!!

V- They use a lot of robots in South Korea to do the housework, right?

A- They do?

- Passes remarks like - Its cool, cloudy and wet today. Feels like Germany.

- When asked his age, responds with zecks, seis, chhe and rarely ever six.

- Greets grandparents on Skype with Guten Morgan, ¿Cómo estás?, Adaab and the likes.

- When told that he can play on the computer for a few minutes, quickly opens up tabs to check the weather on the Moon and Sun (btw there are cities by both the names in the US :) ; opens up a world clock to see which is the place ahead of all in time; and the China Airlines page to see how much money he needs to collect for a ticket to China.

- And is confused what to buy from his first salary, the love of his life - an iPad or a ticket to China !

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Meal Times

...just got a tad bit easier these days. I keep my fingers and toes tightly crossed as I type this. Handing Vansh a worksheet he picks himself to work on - ranging from coloring to pre-reading, pre-math, mazes, basic crosswords has him busy working on those as I put in one morsel after another in his mouth.

The plus - he stays put and works.

The thrill - he is READING and doing a good job at it.

The bonus - Jiya wants to do the same and stays put for her meal too.

Sometimes you seem to have hit the JACKPOT while parenting!!! Amen to more such times!

Watch the video to get jealous if you have kids who run away when you try to feed them and just for fun if you are in the other minority category.



And tell me what are your tricks?

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Forgiveness ...

.. is what I ask of you dear daughter for the last proper update I did for you was at 14 months and now you stand just 2 weeks short of your 2nd birthday!! *gulp* Before you shout "Sacrilege", let me just tell you that I have been making notes of the giant leaps which have been the last 10 months for you and I'll publish them here, just like that, in bits and pieces for your birthday :) I know you'll forgive me because finally there's one person for whom I know I am the world and that's you :) As for now, life's really cool for you.
You drink juice straight from the box and get away with it with just an impish smile and your signature coy expression of putting your hands on top of your face and giggling. You get to play the patient to a doting doctor you have for a brother.

And you get to watch your favorite videos with breakfast served right there.

Must feel like heaven, eh?!

And forgiveness is what I ask of you dear readers and friends for still not posting the promised Kasauli pics. Let's just assume that I have been keeping quite busy and I'll post them soon. So "Friends, I have been keeping quite busy and I'll post them soon! Till next time Chao!"

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Whatchya' say ...

I put the non-returnable label, you get the tape!

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Because ...

Some time back I overheard a pre-teens' conversation and learnt that a convenient answer to any why question, gaining extremely quick personality, is "because". Plain and convenient, indeed! It probably means that you don't really know the reason behind the why or probably are just feeling lazy to reason with the converser and so just answer "because". Little did I know that my 3 year old son would catch up so soon with the latest talk in town! So these are a few examples of short and not so sweet conversations in our household.

I want not to eat apple!
Me: Why?
Because!!

I want not to do nai-nai (take a bath)
me: Why?
Because!!

Convenient indeed! Now mommy tried to pull the same card in an attempt to give the little master a taste of his own medicine.

Me: Vansh you sleep now, I'll sleep after some time.
Vansh: Why?
Me: Because *beaming that I have hit the nail on the head*
Vansh: Because what?
Me: errr ...because ...err ....

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And another someone ...

Is wondering what its like to be a girl :)

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Prayer time turned really funny!

Last night, while folding hands in front of Sai Baba before going to bed, as Vansh repeated after me what I asked him to say

Me: Bhagwan ji, mujhe accha bacha banao. (God, make me a good kid.)

Vansh repeats

Me: Mujhe acche sanskar do. (Bless me with good virtues)

Vansh : Mujhe acchi cars do !!! (Give me good cars!)

HOWZZAT!!!

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What Vansh means!

Its funny, to say the least, the results which emerge when kids who are expanding their communication skills experiment with new words and phrases, in a hit and trial kind of way, using them in what they think might be appropriate situations. These are a few hilarious phrases doing the rounds in the Sukhwani household these days.

We have just recovered, still not completely, from a spate of illnesses and an oft repeated phrase has been "I am feeling better."

Me (looking at a few left over morsels on Vansh's plate): Beta, finish your food!

Vansh : No mummy! I am not hungry. I am feeling better!

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I just turned on the shower inside the bathroom when I heard Vansh talk to me from outside.

Vansh: Mummy, shower on kiya? (Did you turn on the shower?)

Me: Haan beta. (Yes son)

Vansh : Little bit shower?

(I have no idea what he was thinking when he used this one.)

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Many a times, Vansh pretends to be talking on the phone with his dad and asking him, like I do at times, to get a few groceries on his way back.

Vansh: Hello Nona (thats what I call Ashwini). Will you go to Rainbow?
(pauses to wait for an answer)

OK! Get carrots, milk, apple, banana, pizza (now starts pausing between things), peanut butter-jelly (pause), chips (pause)
(eyes me for a moment to see if I have any objection with his list by far. No objection! Great!!)

Continues in one single breath - Get candies, skittles, lollipops, apple juice, orange juice!

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When Vansh tries to sneak in 4 cherries instead of the 'pointed at' 3 while playing Hi-Ho Cherry O just to finish the game and proudly chirp "Vansh jeet gaya!" (Vansh won!), we tell him "Vansh, no cheating!"

A couple of days back, Jiya was trying to get her hands at one of Vansh's books to which what Vansh had to say was "Jiya, no cheating!"

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Red Stop Green Go

Ever since Vansh started getting the concept of colors some 6-7 months back, one of the first things that fascinated him was the traffic lights turning from green to orange to red and he soon figured out, with our help of course, 'green go, red stop, orange slow' and pronto started generalizing it, much to our amusement, to things around of these three particular colors. For instance, if I asked him which t-shirt he would like to wear, he would say

"Green go pehnni hai." (I want to wear 'green go')

or would look at me and exclaim

"Mummy red stop pehnti hai". (Mummy is wearing 'red stop') or better still "Mummy red stop hai, Papa orange slow hai" (Mummy is red stop, papa is orange slow)

An interesting incident happened once at an Indian store where he went with Ashwini to get some groceries. Apparently, there were a couple of other customers in front of Ash and Vansh. The first one was holding a red basket full of groceries and the second one was holding a green one. Thoughtfully looking at those baskets and recalling the newly learnt fascinating information about colors meaning something, he was quick to quip in a loud and clear voice, enough to draw the attention of everyone who was involved and with appropriate hand gestures

"Red stop hota hai, green go hota hai"

as if to tell the person with the red basket to stop and make way for the person with the green basket to go cos thats what their basket colors signified. The green basket man was delighted and wished he could do that and everyone around mighty amused.


Another funny episode took place a few days back when I put up the camera battery for recharging in the charger. The light turns from red to green once the charge is complete. As soon as Vansh spotted the light turn green, he said too me in a hurried tone,

"Mummy, green go ho gayi. Jaldi le lo, orange slow ho jayegi." (Mummy, its green go. Remove it quickly, else it will turn orange slow)

It took mom a moment to realize the context and the meaning of the profound words and once she did, she was found doubling with laughter and once again delighting in the astonishing marvel, that's childhood

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The latest additions to Vansh's vocab ...

... are the words 'maintenance' and 'refreshing'. Impressive, huh!!

The other day, Vansh jiggled out of his room, balancing a kind of big car holding it with one hand and its remote tucked in beneath his arm and in a thick tone said to me, "Mummy, 'nemance' uncle hai Vansh, theek kar diya!" (Mom, I am the maintenance uncle and I have fixed it!) Apparently he was imitating an apartment maintenance guy who had come in the morning to look at the heating unit which was making some noise. The big guys in uniform are THE rockstars for our little guy :)

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The other craze is 'Moe Doodle' from the 'Doodlebops' and his act of pulling the rope in each episode which results in a big load of water landing on his head which he shakes off with a fervent nod and mouths 'Refreshing'! To be able to act the same way, Vansh demands the pail of water be emptied on his head with a thud and off he goes "Refreshing". My laugh is greeted with a sheepish "Funny guy"!!

He's our cute little funny guy indeed!! :)

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Spoiled under thirty crowd!!

Ha ha ha!! I so love these kind of forwarded e-mails.

_____________________________________________________________

When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with
their tedious diatribes about how hard things were
when they were growing up; what with walking
twenty-five miles to school every morning ... uphill
BOTH ways .. yadda, yadda, yadda. And I remember
promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way
I was ever going to gripe like that to my kids about
how hard I had it and how easy they've got it!

But now that I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I
can't help but look around and notice the youth of
today. You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my
childhood, you live in a utopia! And I hate to say it,
but you kids today don't know how good you've got it!

1. When I was a kid, we didn't have the Internet. If
we wanted to know something, we had to go to the
library and look it up ourselves... in the card
catalog!!! (Do you even know what a card catalog is?
Yeah, I didn't think so!)

2. There was no email!! We had to actually write
somebody a letter--with a pen! Then you had to walk
all the way out to the street and put it in the
mailbox and it would take like a week to get there!


3. There were no MP3's or Napsters! If you wanted to
steal music, you had to wait around all day to tape it
off the radio and the DJ would usually ruin the
beginning or end of the song by talking over it!

4. We didn't have fancy conveniences like "Call
Waiting!" If you were on
the phone and somebody else called they got a busy
signal, that's it! We would sit by the hour redialing
and redialing, hoping we could catch them as soon as
they finally hung up the phone.

5. And we didn't have fancy stuff like "Caller ID,"
either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it
was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss,
your worst enemy, your best friend, a collections
agent, a prank caller...you just didn't know!!! You
just had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!

6. We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation or Wii
video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had
the Atari 2600! With games like "Space Invaders" and
"Asteroids"--and the graphics were horrible! Your
"guy" was nothing but a little square! You actually
had to use your imagination! And there were no
multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen
forever! And you could never win...the game just kept
getting harder and harder and faster and faster until
you DIED! Just like LIFE!

7. When you went to the movie theater there no such
thing as stadium seating! All the seats were the same
height! If a tall guy or some old lady with a hat sat
in front of you and you couldn't see, you were just
screwed!

8. Sure, we had cable television, but back then that
was only like 15 channels and there was no on screen
menu! You had to use a little book called a TV Guide
to find out what was on! And there was no Cartoon
Network either! You could only get cartoons on
Saturday Morning. Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We
had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons!

9. And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat
something up, we had to use the stove or the oven...
imagine that! If we wanted popcorn, we had to use
that stupid Jiffy Pop thing, or a pan with HOT oil and
real popcorn kernels and shake it all over the stove,
forever, like an idiot.

10. When we were on the phone with our friends and our
parents walked-in, there was no escape and no chance
of privacy--we were stuck to the wall with a cord, a
seven-foot cord that ran to the phone--not the phone
base, the actual phone! We barely had enough length
to sit on the floor and still be able to twirl the
phone cord in our fingers. If we suddenly had to go
to the bathroom, guess what we had to do....that's
RIGHT...hang up and call them back later...and pray
that they weren't on the phone to somebody else when
you did!

That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today
have got it too easy. You're spoiled!! You guys
wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980!

Regards, The over 30 Crowd

Have a great day!

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A few samplers on Vansh's verbal platter

Scene - Jiya crying.

Vansh (in an absolute grown up tone) - Jiya क्यों रोती है? पापा, मम्मी, Vansh रोते हें? Hanh? (Why are you crying Jiya, Do papa, muumy or Vansh cry like that?)

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Scene - Vansh snatching something from Jiya's hand

Mom (in a reprimanding tone, voice raised) - Vansh क्यों गन्दी बात कर रहा है? ऐसे Jiya के हाथ से छीनते हें? (Vansh why are you doing something wrong? Should you be snatching things from Jiya?)

Vansh (solemn tone) - Vansh को नहीं बात करनी। (Vansh doesn't want to talk)

2 minutes later

Vansh - Mummy, Doodlebops song चलाओ। (Mom, play Doodlebops song)

Mom - आप तो बात नहीं कर रहा था। (You said you were not talking)

Vansh - Sovy (for sorry). Doodlebops song चलाओ।

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Scene - All of us going in the car

Vansh (out of the blue) - Hello Arunabh! What you doing? 941-621. Okay! Ya! OK Bye!

Mom - Who are you talking to?

Vansh - Vansh meeting hai. Vansh saath Arunabh saath. (Vansh has a meeting with Arunabh)

Mom and dad laugh.

Vansh joins in and says - Funny Guy!!!

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Mr Niño is a trashman!!

One of Niño's favorite books these days is Trashy Town by Andrea Zimmerman and David Clemesha. Its a book about a trashman Mr Gilly who has does the Oh So ENVIABLE task of driving a BIG blue GARBAGE TRUCK!! Yeah thats the enthusiasm and awe we see in Niño when he spots a trash truck and better still a trashman - well I am sure the big truck making rambling noises when the trashman empties the big trash cans into it has a great appeal - audio and video, and not without reason, for a 2 year old. In addition the book has a good rhythm to it with repetitive text - "Dump it in, smash it down! Drive around the Trashy Town!!" and two of Niño's favorite words "STOP" and "NO" on every page! So in addition to repeating the words of the book all day long, Niño also likes to pretend that he is Mr Gilly himself, drives his own garbage truck around the house and tries to turn each one of the containers (the bigger and bluer it is, the better, for its close resemblance to the actual trash cans) into the truck and 'dumps it in, smashes it down!' Things falling to the ground have a potentiality of cracking him up with laughter like nothing else does. That the contents of a 4 cu ft toy box are too much for a 1 ft long trash truck is something he still needs to figure out!!

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Bal Hanuman

Last night we were watching the movie 'Bal Hanuman' with Vansh. The Hindi was too tough for him to understand. So when Lord Brahma asked Indra Dev "इस बालक की यह दुर्दशा kisne की?", he asked me "Mummy, kaun hain? Kya bol rahe hain?" (Who are they? What are they saying?) I explained to him "Yeh bhagwan ji hain aur yeh bol rahe hain ki Hanuman ji ko owie kisne ki?" (This is God and he's asking who hurt Hanuman ji?). What resulted was a sudden spate of questions :

"Mummy, blue waale bhagwan ji kya bol rahe hain? Yellow waale police uncle kya bol rahe hain? Bal numan ji owie aa raha hai? Numan ji fly kar rahe hain? Police uncle pakad ke le jayenge yellow waale bhagwan ji ko?"

(What is the blue colored God saying? Yellow colored uncle is police uncle, is it? Is Hanuman hurt? Is he flying? Is police going to catch the yellow colored God?)

Boy oh boy!! Talk of generalizing personal everyday experiences to others around. When he gets over excited around Jiya and starts pressing her tummy too hard or pulling her arm a tad bit vehemntly, even after being reminded to be gentle, we warn him by saying that Police uncle does not spare those who harm their little sisters and takes them away. On several occasions, as a result, when he hears a crying child in the building corridor, he makes up a story "Police uncle girl ko leke ja rahe hain. Chhoti sister ko owie kiya." (The police uncle is taking away the girl because she hit her little sister.) Taking it one step further to apply the story to Gods in heaven sure was hilarious for us.

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acting BIG and loving it :)

Talking about acting grown up, here's a few things Vansh has been saying to Jiya these days.

-Jiya often grabs her feet and puts them in her mouth. Many a times, her socks remain there and out comes the foot. To this, depending on his mood at that time, this is what Vansh has to say

*good mood* - Jiya kya karti hai? (in a sing song voice) Muhn mein nahin daalo socks, chhee chhee hai. (JIya, what are you doing? Don't put your socks in your mouth. They are dirty.) and tries to put them back on.

*grumpy mood* - Jiya!!! mat dalo muhn mein! Gussa karoon!! (Jiya, don't put in your mouth! Should I scold you?) and snatches them from her hand.

- At times, she does the same with her clothes thus revealing her tummy. To which, Vansh would go "Pssst! Jiya aise nahin karte!" and pull her dress to cover her belly again. Look who's being a protective big brother, eh!

- Often times, Jiya is not able to hold on to the toys we give her for very long and drops them on the ground from her bouncy, to which Vansh says "Jiya, mat fenko toys" (Jiya don't throw the toys) and hands it back to her.

He so loves being able to boss someone around :)

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Acting all grown up :)

Now a days whenever I call Ashwini in office, Vansh too wants to talk to him. For that matter, Vansh wants to talk to anyone we call. At times if Ashwini happens to be in a meeting or just generally busy or may be driving, I tell Vansh "Papa abhi busy hain/ drive kar rahe hain, baad mein call karke baat karenge/ghar aane waale hain, phir baat karna". One such day, Ashwini called back after some time. When I handed the phone to Vansh, he scrunched up his eyes and sounding like a grown up, said
Vansh -Papa busy ho, meeting mein ho, hanh?
Ashwini -Nahi beta meeting mein nahin hoon.
Vansh - Nahin? Drive kar rahe ho?

At this I couldn't control my laughter any more and burst out laughing which made him all conscious to which he stuck out his tongue and started laughing himself.

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Code Language :)

This happened a couple of months earlier. A very common way of parents of kids aged two and three to communicate with each other on touchy topics like candies and juices is to spell out the word. For instance, if I want to ask Ashwini if he would like to have a chocolate I would say "C.H.O.C.O.L.A.T.E. khaana hai?" This is to avoid getting into a tiff with Vansh on giving him one too. Now one day we had a playdate at our apartment and there was one mom with a daughter Divya who is Vansh's age and another one with a daughter Riya who is slightly older than Jiya. So I asked Divya's mom "Would Divya like to have J.U.I.C.E.?" because I was not sure about her stance on the same and the other mom goes "Woh kya hota hai?" and it had both of us in splits. It also so happened that just a few minutes back she had been asking us about snacks and finger foods she could start offering to Riya and she thought we were talking about another one of those. Still laughing, we told her about our code language till the kids get the hang of spellings :))

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Main busy hoon ...

There are many a times Vansh wants to be played with, especially ever since we introduced him to board games. He would lay down 'Cherry O' and pronounce "Vansh orange khelta hai, Mummy red khelti hai". And on several such occasions I have to tell him "Beta, mamma abhi busy hai. Abhi aape aape khelo, main thodi der mein aapke saath khelti hoon." (Mom is busy. Play by yourself for some time and I'll join you in a bit.) Last night he was sitting on Ashwini's lap while he was working on his laptop when I asked him to come and brush his teeth. "Main busy hoon" pat came the reply. Huh!! Kids sure know how to give parents a taste of their own medicine, right!!

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Wednesday afternoon feedings

Wednesday afternoons, usually become a little challenging when we return from ECFE at about 1:30 and it is already Vansh's naptime and he still needs to be fed (yeah FED, which boy doesn't feed himself at close to 3 years) and so does Jiya. So I have a hungry and sleepy 2 year old (now thats a DEADLY combination) and a hungry infant (she is smart enough to take her nap during the parents' class - oh yeah she's had enough of complaining moms and dads!!). Well today was different in a very pleasant way because I decided to take-out Chalupas - a current favorite with Vansh, from the Taco Bell drive thru. This ensured one happy kid out of two. Now to take care of the second who flails her arms to be picked up to be at the table and then goes chomp chomp chomp, I handed her a Parle G biscuit instead. Let me post pictures to let you see what happened next.
and 5 minutes later, I have a triumphant and happy second kid as well!!
Icing on the cake, they both napped simultaneously for two hours straight!! Wow! It couldn't have gotten any better than that! God please don't let such scenarios be jinxed just because I am writing about them.

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