Wednesday, January 30, 2008

The Best Birth Story

Thought you would get a chuckle out of this one ...

*************************************************************************************

I've been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids
myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second grade classroom a few years back.

When I was a kid, I loved show-and-tell. So I always have a few sessions with my students. It helps them get over shyness and usually, show-and-tell is pretty tame. Kids bring in pet turtles, model airplanes, pictures of fish they catch, stuff like that. And I never, ever place any boundaries or limitations on them. If they want to lug it in to school and talk about it, they're welcome..

Well, one day this little girl, Erica, a very bright, very outgoing
kid, takes her turn and waddles up to the front of the class with a pillow stuffed under her sweater.

She holds up a snapshot of an infant. "This is Luke, my baby brother, and I'm going to tell you about his birthday."

"First, Mom and Dad made him as a symbol of their love, and then Dad
put a seed in my Mom's stomach, and Luke grew in there. He ate for nine months through an umbrella cord."

She's standing there with her hands on the pillow, and I'm trying not
to laugh and wishing I had my camcorder with me. The kids are watching her in amazement.
"Then, about two Saturdays ago, my Mom starts saying and going, 'Oh,
Oh, Oh, Oh!' Erica puts a hand behind her back and groans. "She walked around the house for, like an hour, 'Oh, oh, oh!' (Now this kid is
doing a hysterical duck walk and groaning.) "My Dad called the middle wife. She delivers babies, but she doesn't have a sign on the car like the Domino's man. They got my Mom to lie down in bed like this." Then Erica lies down with her back against the wall.

"And then, pop! My Mom had this bag of water she kept in there in case he got thirsty, and it just blew up and spilled all over the bed, like psshhheew!" This kid has her legs spread with her little hands miming water flowing away. It was too much!

"Then the middle wife starts saying 'push, push,' and 'breathe, breathe'. They started counting, but never even got past ten. Then, all of a sudden, out comes my brother. He was covered in yucky stuff that they all said it was from Mom's play-centre, so there must be a lot of toys inside there."
Then Erica stood up, took a big theatrical bow and returned to her
seat.
I'm sure I applauded the loudest. Ever since then, when it's show-and-tell day, I bring my camcorder, just in case another "Middle Wife" comes along.

3 comments:

Preethi said...

Oh God.. I am laughing so much... you are right this is the best birth story ever.. I wish you had your camcorder too :)

dipali said...

This is just so cute, Neera:)

Anonymous said...

i have seen your web page its interesting and informative.
I really like the content you provide in the web page.
But you can do more with your web page spice up your page, don't stop providing the simple page you can provide more features like forums, polls, CMS,contact forms and many more features.
Convert your blog "yourname.blogspot.com" to www.yourname.com completely free.
free Blog services provide only simple blogs but we can provide free website for you where you can provide multiple services or features rather than only simple blog.
Become proud owner of the own site and have your presence in the cyber space.
we provide you free website+ free web hosting + list of your choice of scripts like(blog scripts,CMS scripts, forums scripts and may scripts) all the above services are absolutely free.
The list of services we provide are

1. Complete free services no hidden cost
2. Free websites like www.YourName.com
3. Multiple free websites also provided
4. Free webspace of1000 Mb / 1 Gb
5. Unlimited email ids for your website like (info@yoursite.com, contact@yoursite.com)
6. PHP 4.x
7. MYSQL (Unlimited databases)
8. Unlimited Bandwidth
9. Hundreds of Free scripts to install in your website (like Blog scripts, Forum scripts and many CMS scripts)
10. We install extra scripts on request
11. Hundreds of free templates to select
12. Technical support by email

Please visit our website for more details www.HyperWebEnable.com and www.HyperWebEnable.com/freewebsite.php

Please contact us for more information.


Sincerely,

HyperWebEnable team
info@HyperWebEnable.com