Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Getting ready for the move and what's up ...

A lot has been going on at our end. Its been stressful off late tracking the Delhi Nursery Admissions scene from here in the US. We had chosen this time - the beginning of Vansh's formal school to head back home and had been planning towards the same. Last year Delhi nursery admissions hit the headlines several times for the various new developments that took place, Delhi Government stepping in to stop the private schools from interviewing 3 something year old kids to judge them before granting or rejecting admission, Ganguly committee being formed and coming up with a point system based on several parameters like distance of home from school, alumni parents, siblings in the same school, etc to grant admission to kids, lowering the age a child gets into a school from 4+ to 3+ and so on and so forth. To cut a long story short, it has gotten very very tough to get your child in a school and I am not even saying a school of your choice. Everything seems so arbitrary, perfectly well settled and well qualified parents find their child not getting admission anywhere. As a result the tension and stress resulting is way too high. Anyways I have worried all I could and obviously with no results, so I am past that stage too. I have also come to terms with the fact that although we had planned to fly in end December-early January to be in time for the admission procedures which took place in January-February last academic year, this year they have already begun and we are just waiting for the first school that we want to apply to, to come out with the forms and then I and the kids will fly on a short notice of about a fortnight. Why wait till the end, you ask! Well Ashwini had planned everything at his workplace for January too and so he cannot fly before that and we don't want to be in a position where I reach there and he stays back here alone and the relevant forms don't come out for another month. Oh Darling yeh hai India! is what comes to mind at this time.

Anyways so right now we are busy winding up, selling stuff we accumulated over a period of 5 years here, taking stock of what we can lug back and what needs to be given away in the midst of the everyday activities of the kids. Vansh is loving his pre-school and asks to be taken there even on the four days that he is off. He is generally so cheery in his disposition when he returns and radiates joy all around. He also started swimming classes for a month, twice a week from last week and he started out by not entering the water at all for the first 2 classes. This Monday after a few encouraging pushes (physically handing him) into his instructor's hands and a few threats that I would leave if he doesn't go in (thank God for Hindi at these times ;)), he did just fine. Both his instructors did a wonderful job with him, being very gentle with him, telling him that they would never ever leave him and encouraging him to do certain things inside the water, I could see that he had formed a bond with both at the end of the 30 minute class and is looking forward to go today.

Jiya is doing great too. A few days back, she went through a super crabby, super clingy phase where she clung on to me all the time, didn't eat well at all and so remained cranky for the major part of the day. I think the teething pain was a bit too much for her at that time. She is back to being the tantrum throwing, foot stomping and laughing the next minute self. She actually just lies down on the floor, anywhere, even in the middle of the parking lot when met with even an iota of resistance from us with pouted lips for just one second and then a straight face and then decides what to do next depending on our next reaction. A scowl from us and she lets out a cry, a smile or a camera to capture that moment brings out laughs. Hah - the drama queen!

With each other, we go through phases of pleasant and nasty in our home. On nasty days, they get at each others' and our nerves. They want to play with the same things at the same time, refuse to share even the things which are in profusion like blocks or cars - each one wants each one of them. They want to sit on a particular chair at the same time. Jiya's even started getting physical now. She pulls Vansh's hair or bites him, thankfully always through this sweat shirt and so never really gets to the skin. Vansh on the other hand is of course smarter and knows that if he irritates Jiya long enough, she just throws off the toy in her hand out of anger and then its his to play with technically. Of course we don't let him get away with it when we are watching.

And pleasant times are a treat. They miraculously sit together on a tiny little ride on toy. Vansh always lets Jiya have her way or exchanges toys very sweetly - Jiya tu yeh le le, please! or chides her very gently when she gets into what he is doing - tu kya kar rahi hai lallu! They take turns putting coins in a tiny little hole of the piggy bank or putting beans in a small hole one by one. Both of them read separate books, play with different cars following each otjer in and out of rooms. Vansh helps me in feeding Jiya who miraculously opens her mouth when he feeds him the same bite that I tried feeding her few seconds back.

And I think about the times that lie ahead and shudder. When in a snap, they'll be all grown, spending more time out of the homes than in, opening and flapping their wings to fly away, when their squeals and their giggles or even their screams and their cries won't fill the home as they do now and that's when I just tickle them and roll them around to make them laugh some more and try to soak in everything - the sights, the sounds, the smells and that warm fuzzy feeling inside of looking at your children grow up and swell with pride at just that.


Suma said...

all the best for the move...don't worry about the admissions...everything will be okay...

and the pics of the two kiddos stole my heart...enjoy these moments cos it is these and more which will sustain you in the future...

Kodi's Mom said...

hey, i didnt know you were planning for r2i!
just as you're ready to leave, thigns are going great here, aren't they?! life :) good luck with admissions.

so very nice to see V & J behaving as siblings should - fight a little, hug a little and generally love each other to bits. great pic - the one w/ fisher price ride-on, we have the exact same one.

Gauri said...

Good Luck with the move Neera and yes - let me reiterate what Suma and K's mom have said - try not to worry too much. I know school admissions is what weighs heavily on any parent's mind - it will all even out.

Loved loved loved the pictures of the siblings. :)

Good luck, once again.

Monika,Ansh said...

Oh admissions are always crappy business. I hope u get the kids into a school of your choice.

Must be tough packing up & stuff.All the best for the move.Was this planned for a while?

The pics of the kids are great. Loved their naughty smiles.

Monika said...

all the best for the move...the kids stories are always fun to read

Mama - Mia said...

all the best for the big move back!

hope everything goes off really smooth and to your satisfaction!

and need i say the pictures are absolutely adorable!! :)



Preethi said...

lovely sibling pics as always Neera.. you know when I see these pics and read your warm fuzzy notes on how the siblings play.. even if it about Vansh irritating Jiya to get a toy (that was so cute).. I wonder if Cheeky needs a sibling too.. (no don't jump into conclusions ..that's not happening!! but still.. you make it sound so simple!
Good luck with the move.. I did not know you were planning to move!! I am sure you are super excited..

Neera said...

Suma: Thank you for your encouraging words dear :) And yeah so true - precious moments sustaining you in the future.

km: Absolutely, many a times I and Ashwini have this discussion and he teases me - we and the kids are settled so well here, let's stay back :)Thank you for the good luck _ i need it by trucksful :)

Gauri: Thanks a bunch for the luck and the good wishes :) And am glad you liked the pictures - I am of the opinion that they do capture the essence of their relationship quite well :)

Monika,Ansh: Yeah we had planned that we would go back ever since we came and then chose this time, like I said, of Vansh starting school as the logical point in time. Thank you for your good wishes :)

Monika, mama-mia: Thank u dear :)

Preethi: I'll be very honest in replying to you Preethi because I have felt before as well that even though you keep saying no to the second child, you are in a dilemma and many a times lean towards having one :) Its basically what you want. I grew up as an only child and didn't mind it as much then as I do now when I see the relationship my husband shares with his brother and tells me stories from his childhood or when I see other other siblings growing up together. And right now I worry a lot about my parents which I wouldn't have had I had a sibling - someone to share my feelings with (abt parents).
So even though there are tough times, I'll mince no words and tell you the first 4 months when Jiya was born was, were horrible. I'll never ever forget that time in my life because Vansh had a mighty tough time adjusting. However I feel had it happened now, the transition might have been easier for him because he's in much better control of his emotions now than he was then, as also a more expressive talker. I might be wrong though because irrespective of the elder sibling's age (till abt 4 years), I have heard they have and give to parents a tough time. Not to say that i regret that I had them so close, I would still do the same if I was to relive that time. But after those initial hiccups, it hasn't been bad at all. Yes we still do face tough times which I write about here but nothing when you look at the bigger picture. So if u were to ask me, you know what my answer is :)

PG said...

you write such wonderful posts! Wish i could express myself like you do.
There is a lot happenning right now at your end.
How I envy everybody who goes back to india. :)
Well, not really...except that Rishab would have more cousines and family there.
I'm sure you are super excited. I guess Vansh too. Love to kids and take care.

noon said...

Neera - again a copy/paste post for me! :) Similar things happening here. In fact I just saw a pic of KB and KG riding the same ride on toy and wanted to post it but decided some other time. And all of what you say is so true - the last para.
And Preethi - go for it girl!

Making Memories said...

hey dint know u wud decide on moving so quickly...look at us we seem to have been caught in a vicious circle.
loved the last para, so true....needless to say pics are simply beautiful.
good luck with the moving girl...more for kids to be able to adjust in India..

did i tell u i and moon are flying on 3rd dec, sandeep is joining late, coming bak on 12th jan...wud love to meet u in India

Neera said...

pg - Thank you so much for your kind words dear! Yup thats the biggest advantage - kids grow up in a family/community they identify with and feel close to. Vansh is super excited for sure :)

noon - How I wish we could meet once before we go! Sigh - may be in India now :)

Deepali - Thanks much Deepali for all your good wishes. Shall surely meet up in Delhi.