Dear Kids

A few days back I was going through my archives and came across this post and this. My God! Yes, those were tough times, really tough and I blogged about them to let it out of my system, to look for support from fellow bloggers and friends and it helped. Now, when the times are GOOD, in all fairness to both of you, I should and I am going to blog about it too :)

- Knock on wood! But the way both of you have been behaving is nothing short of awesome! Great job V and J. I mean I can actually take 45 minute long showers in contrast to the 1 minute loo break that I dreaded taking at times. You work silently on worksheets, talk to each other about the colors that will look good on whatever it is you are coloring, Vansh, you help Jiya with writing letters and when I come out from the shower, you are playing nicely and talking to each other even more nicely. And today you actually told me, "Mom, we are kind of fighting but just with words and not with our hands!" How cool is that! And then after a few more minutes, "Even the word fight is over!" *Phew* I wonder you are the same children from the posts above. Yes you have your moments of getting on each others' nerves and mine but then phrases like the ones I just mentioned so make up for it.

- The way you stand up for each other melts my heart so many times in a day. Like the other day, when I took off a 'quarter' sticker from Jiya's reward chart because she had hit you, Vansh you told me that its okay, I should give it back to her because she is little and doesn't understand the right thing at times but will not hit you again. I mean you guaranteed that for her on her behalf when you yourself were the victim just moments ago. I wish I had words to describe that feeling and more than that I wish I had a sibling who would do that for me. *Sigh*

- And Jiya, how is it that when I tell you to clean up, there is a possibility that it might fall on deaf ears (sometimes, I have to admit :) but when your hero, your older brother tells you that, I can be certain that the job will be done :) And yes, I am talking about cleaning up here, can you believe it!!

- And again, you gave me another of those I don't believe it! moments when the other day Vansh was singing his oft repeated "Bad girl Jiya" song which is more like to tease you when things don't go his way, for instance, when he is losing in a board game, I know not a very nice thing to say but then you don't seem to really mind it most of the times. But the other day, you actually laughed and told him "You are so funny! I didn't even do anything now!" , you know like its a ha-ha thing between you two and he did in the wrong context. I found it rather amazing for a 3 year old to react that way :)

So well, atta boy and atta girl! I am so loving this gig of being your mom at this phase - laughing, playing, clowning around! Amen to more such times!

Love you forever,

Mamma

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Chalk and Cheese

Scene 1

We are watching the movie Jumanji, all four of us. Its the scene where the young boy Peter rolls a 5 and Alan Parrish (Robin Williams) comes back from the jungles after 26 years and immediately starts calling out for his parents in his house, unaware that a lot has changed and that his parents no longer stay there. In less than a minute, Vansh asks in an extremely wavering voice which becomes quite loud when he is feeling the way he is right now, trying hard to hold back tears, "Where are his parents? When is he going to meet them? Why is he not being able to find them? Why are we watching this movie? I don't want to watch it! Lets switch it off!"

We switch it off. Before we can pacify Vansh, Jiya starts screaming "I want to watch it! I want to watch how he comes out of the game. I want to see elephants and monkeys and dinosaurs coming out of the game! Turn it on, turn it on!"

We somehow manage to settle for a break - changing into night suits, water, brush, the works! In the meantime we are able to convince Vansh that its just a movie - its fiction, it never happens for real. Alan will find his parents soon! (We hadn't watched the movie earlier but Hindi movies being our staple, we guessed he would.) We switch it on again - Vansh clings, Jiya gets closer and closer to the TV almost wanting to be a part of it. If she could, she would have just grabbed those dice and rolled them good.

Scene 2

We are at Chuck E Cheese and the Vansh is looking at some screen touch game and Jiya is going on those climbing tubes and slides. She tells me that she wants to go to the police car on the other end the way to which is a kind of a maze. I tell her she may and I'll guide her with my hand and eye movement because she can't hear me once inside the tubes. She moves on and after every meter or so there's circular peeks from where we can see each other. She keeps moving and at this point Ashwini calls out to Vansh to look at what Jiya is doing and if he would like to join her. I tell him not to do so because then Vansh wouldn't let her go either. Anyways, Vansh hadn't heard Ashwini (thankfully). So Jiya continues. She comes to a point where she has to change directions to get to the police car and I would not be visible to her for about 2 meters. I move my lips and my arms slowly to tell her to turn left and go in the green tube and then turn right. She starts but by this time Vansh comes and looks at her in the tubes and freaks out, waving to her to get back. A worried look flashes on her face. I repeat my previous arm and lip gestures. She goes on and in a few seconds reaches the police car and waves triumphantly, stays there for a few minutes and following my directions again comes back down a slide. Vansh, in the meantime has reached the end of the slide (from the floor side) and is calling out to her to come down soon.

Jiya wants to go again. Vansh tries to dissuade her. We try to encourage him to go with her. He says he'll just come down the slide (which is at the very beginning once you climb up) but is tempted to go further because there's a spaceship at one end and a police car at the other, both his favorites, asks in an uber innocent tone, "Jiya will take me there?" and somehow musters up the courage to go. Once they climb up, he is two minds whether to slide down or go ahead. Jiya is able to convince him to come behind her. The tube to the spaceship is straightforward. he quickly rushes there, stays there for like 4 seconds, follows my hand movement to the police car, stays there for another 5 (seconds) and rushes back and takes a different route. To be honest I had feared that. Its not rocket science but after all its a maze like 12 feet above the ground. Till the time I reach below him, he starts crying (we can't hear each other). I just calmly guide with my hands and lips as to which color tube to come through and he scrambles and finally back. Jiya wants to go yet again but all of us decide against it.

He is super cautious, she is brash. He is extremely sensitive, she is laid back.

And then there are other times when he'll just go and talk to people he has just met a couple of times in the apartment complex and be such an affable kid and she'll be this taking forever to warm up, unsociable child.

But what is constant is that if one is chalk, the other is cheese. We have read this pretty cute book on opposites about a brother and sister who like to do all things opposite - like drinking cold milk vs warm, playing outside vs inside, taking a light bag vs stuffing all soft toys. They seem to be playing those roles to the hilt.

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Chicago - Part I

As I loaded the dishwasher and went over the happenings of the day, I realized what an eventful one it had been. Not just the day, in fact this week had been pretty significant. The second car on Monday, Vansh's first day of school on Tuesday, the bed today, Jiya's Kids Club class, a preschool tour, a successful visit to the Social Security Office, and waiting for a few more big ones in the next few days. I also realized that I am never going to get time to get back to my blog, I'll have to make time in the midst of it all. So as I am waiting for the milk to cool for setting the curd, I switched on the computer and resisted the urge to go onto craigslist for finding an easel and a tent with a tunnel and after a quick look at my inbox, opened blogger. The kids are growing up way too fast with personalities emerging and changing with lightning speed and I wish at least to pen down the big points if not all.

The few friends who still follow my blog probably know already that 3 weeks back we moved to Chicago. Yeah destiny again showed its enormous presence and owing to Ashwini's job we moved yet again. What we had thought to be the final move a little over two years back turned out to be not so. Now the post can take several directions but what I had in mind foremost was to pen down how the kids are taking it, how they are conducting themselves while interacting with peers at school, at other classes, etc, how they are feeling and the likes.

I am rather pleased that they are not giving me a hard time as I had expected they would. From a joint family filled with much love and pampering and many sights and sounds all day long, someone to play with and talk to any time of the day you feel like, the charged atmosphere that results from just the fact that you are staying in a city like Delhi, to the stark contrast of the noiselessness of a quiet Chicago suburb, the weather still not conducive to pulling people out of their homes for walks and hence some socializing in a new place, I had expected them to be dull and bored the first few weeks. Luckily they were very excited about the new surroundings, literally soaking in the newness of every experience they got. From spotting the familiar goldfish (from 2 years back :)) on the Target aisles, the Cheetos that they always used to have with a Subway sandwich, the chalupa at Taco Bell, Vansh was rather happy to see he had familiarities to come back to here.

His interaction with people around has been splendid. Not withstanding that his spoken English needs much improvement, he doesn't hesitate all to say what comes to his mind when someone talks to him. He conducts himself very confidently. Two weeks back, I was at the park and in my conversation with a gentleman who was there with his son told him that we had moved from India a few days back. Vansh added to say that "we come by Lufthansa from India to Munich and Munich to Chicago". At the library, when a librarian asked him how he was he said "I work (am working) on the computer just like office!" Yesterday at his school, they took the children to the computer lab and had them do something (draw a flower, he says) on iMacs. He, needless to say, was elated and told me that today asked his teacher whether they would be going everyday to which she said no. I can bet had she said yes, his next question would have been would they be getting a laptop/iPad for home.

Jiya was confident too in her preschool program today. In a few minutes was ready to leave me and join the group for a bubble making activity. Right now she is enrolled for just once a week class and I told her that if she does well there, plays with other kids, talks to them and the teacher, I would enroll her in a dance/music class since she loves it. She is on the shy and reserved side though she is getting better. To which she said "I promise I will be good! Please enroll me now only."

In the mornings when they were home, the kids chatted with both set of grandparents and their chacha chachi, who are missing them enormously, almost everyday. Vansh told them about everything he had been doing, the new things he had been getting, showed it to them on the webcam and alongside got a chance to browse nokia and blackberry sites since he got the laptop not password protected during this time. He is way too crazy about phones and computers. He now troubleshoots online when something is not working at the grandparents' end much to their delight and admiration! At that time, the kids are almost like there again, sharing notes, making silly faces, laughing. Its really heartening that technology lets us do so much inspite of being far away.

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The world of .com

It so happened that one day my father in law's inbox was open on the desktop. He stepped away for a few minutes to attend to something else. It was during the time when IPL was going on this year. I think the Mumbai Indians team was flashing on the side of the inbox that caught Vansh's attention. He clicked on it and lo and behold. All the pictures that he could ever dream of, a very very catchy look with all the jazz, it was like a dream come true. He spent a lot of time on it looking at cricketers' profiles, snapshots of various matches, speeds of bowlers because speed fascinates him.

In more or less the same time frame, looking at his passionate interest in airplanes, airports, etc (he remembered the color of the two planes that we had taken one and a half years back from US to here, the time when the wheels folded when the planes took off, he remembered E8, the gate number from which we had boarded the plane and that was the first combination he made if you gave him magnetic letters and numbers), I searched for some take off videos and videos of inside the cockpit on youtube and showed it to him. His little yet fast paced mind put two and two together and gradually made him realize that there's an address bar where in you punch in a few letters followed by .com and what follows thereafter is nothing short of a magical journey. Ever since, there has been no looking back.

The things that he now does are rather amusing. One of his favorite thing to do remains looking at airplanes' videos on youtube. It helps that once you type in the first few letters of 'kingfisher', say 'kin...', several spellings come down below making his job super easy and rendering mom's help useless.

During the Commonwealth games here, he saw Ashwini look at the games' schedule and book tickets online and in short create magic again and so he added it to his mental list of favorites. He was often found browsing through the website clicking on various stadium names and trying to book tickets himself. Thank God he still doesn't know the concept of credit cards, for the concepts he does know, he puts them to excellent use. Like he once put in Ashwini's company name, say XYZ, in google. Unimpressed by the technical website which was the first result, he clicked on the second one which was a jobs website where you apply for jobs. He typed in his name at the correct place, our home phone number which he has recently memorized in the contact number space and XYZ where it said company's name and went on to announce smugly that he had applied for a job in papa's company.

He often visits spicejet.com or air-india.com to book tickets to Bangalore or Chennai which was where Ashwini recently travelled for some trainings. I mentioned his immense interest in KBC in my last post which is also a regular destination because he is very very keen to register me as a contestant.

And to get an opportunity to get his hands on the computer, he has become one smart negotiator knowing and implementing the tricks of persuasion, black mail, sweet talk to the hilt.

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Updates

Its been close to 8 long months since I posted last. Needless to say, so many things have happened. The kids have gone ahead and grown by leaps and bounds :) The prominent thought that clouds my mind these days is how much worse could be the teen years after all. I mean they assert themselves on what they want to wear when and where including at night, take off their jacket as soon as they get on the school bus because they anyway wore it only because I fought and insisted, on the way they want their hair to be styled, again style it the way they want as soon as they get on the school bus even if I somehow coax them into styling it the decent way. I mean is there going to be any more to it than this. God only knows how I am going to handle it!
Apart from the fights, there are good things happening too! For one, Vansh has learnt the significance of touching elders' feet. The idea has dawned on him gradually. 'You touch dadi's feet on Diwali, she gives you a 500 rupee note'. Let me try it with nana nani in the evening. Oh wow, they do the same. Thats easy!! Oh I can do that for Crax or Kurkure as well! Why didn't someone tell me that earlier! So its feet touching galore these days in these parts of the world :)
Jiya on the other hand has it even easier. Touch feet, but why? I can get the same results with a tantrum! Its an easy small one with grandma. Mom is a slightly tougher nut to crack, but crack she does, you know with a more long drawn one!
As for her shyness, things have started looking up just a teeny bit. She now greets her teachers she has been meeting for over 9 months now at her playschool with a smile. And my friends, some of whom she has been meeting for close to 2 years now at the park sometimes get a nod when they ask her a question.
Dressing up continues to be a hot favorite. She can practically wear a lehnga every single day with much joy with bangles and earrings to match. Throw in a neck piece and she'll be on top of the world unrelentingly posing for the camera.
Commonwealth games were a huge hit with Vansh and continue to be a hot favorite dominating his conversation with anybody along with Kaun Banega Crorepati. Combine both and you get a very interesting mix of questions that he throws at family members and visiting guests after inviting them to sit on the hot seat. But he's a patriot first, you know. So the answer to the question, 'Who won the most medals at Commonwealth Games 2010?' would be met with a 'Galat Jawab' if you answer Australia instead of India :)
So that was my latest update and my come back post. Lots more to say and intend to say I do much more regularly from now on since I am home again after a short stint at work.

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Vansh turns 5 and another BIG news

So finally the wait ended, the wait that lasted almost a year when he kept asking whose birthday is it next and had the order on his finger tips and kept repeating "Pehle nani ka b'day aayega, phir papa, phir Jiya, .... , phir chachi ka b'day, phir dadi ka aur phir VANSH KA!" In the last week before his b'day, he had already started saying "You know, next year I'll turn 6 years old!" oft leading to responses like "How about first turning 5 dude!"

But its so heart warming to see and feel the excitement, the glee in his voice and the wonder in his queries. "So will you buy me new clothes for 5 year old children then, new shoes too?", "So will I grow taller?", "When will I turn as old as papa?" and then the countdown every morning, "Is it today" followed by a whiny "Why not?" I wish for you to be always so enthusiastic about beginning a new year in your life, dear son as I wish for you the bestest of joys and the most wonderful cheer. I do expect a lot from you, you know that and we try hard together. We are successful in some things and have to try even harder in some more.

The other BIG news is that I get back to work next week. After 6 long years ..haaah. Even though its a 7 week contract to begin with, but for me, its still big. Its in the school that I worked in before getting married and moving to the US. I am thrilled to be getting back. You know out of the total of 5 meals that I have to feed my allergic-to-food and even more allergic-to-the feeding-mommy kids, 3 would be done by the daycare that we decide to put them in while I am away!!!! How cool is that?! Okay so thats not the only thrill factor ;) I had to go to meet the Principal and my HOD (Head of Department) today and Vansh was home with his grandmother. He was a bag full of questions when I returned ...

- So did you teach today? You were mam today? Don't make faces the way you do with me, okay, otherwise children will say our mam is so funny! Ohh, okay, thanks for the reality check!

- So who will drop me at my bus stop and who'll pick me up? Oh so if you go before me, I'll drop you at your bus stop, okay!

- Today he got quite worried about going to his Karate class, my mother in law told me. he even changed into his uniform and told her "Will you please take me since mamma has been away for so long?" when we have to go only inthe evening at 5:00 and I returned at like 12:00 :) But to be honest I felt good about the role that I play in his life and that he is realising it.

- Jiya chipped in with her queries - so will you go in Bhaiya's school bus? Why not?

I have a lot of apprehensions myself. To be working first time ever after having kids. I am so used to being there for them all the time as are they. What would it be like? I hope and I pray to the kind Lord to be especially generous with his blessings on us right now, to watch over us as we start yet another new chapter in our lives.

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The Journey to the Achievement Week

Vansh has in his school starting today what they call the achievement week, in which basically they would be tested and graded on whatever they have done throughout the year. As I and Ashwini cajoled him into learning at least 2 more rhymes out of the 20 odd rhymes, other than the ‘Aeroplane, aeroplane’ and ‘Lal peeli motor’ in a last ditch effort last evening, I realized that making him prepare for the said week has been a rather amusing experience.

- As you might have noticed, the rhymes that he did remember well are related to transport. No surprise that. Day before yesterday, I asked him to narrate the 'teddy bear, teddy bear turn around rhyme’ which he narrated as ‘teddy bear, teddy bear up in the sky; where are you going flying do high’. Basically he was just replacing the aeroplane word with the teddy bear in the ‘Aeroplane, aeroplane’ rhyme. On being asked what was he saying, he replied that the teddy bear is riding in the aeroplane. Hmmm, okay – what can one say to that except laughing at the logic!

In another instance last evening, Ashwini asked him to narrate a rhyme titled ‘2 little apples’. I’ll quote the conversation that took place :-

Vansh – 3 little monkeys jumping on the bed

Ashwini – I asked you to narrate 2 little apples

Vansh – No, 4 little monkeys …

Ashwini – 2 little apples

Vansh – No, 6 little monkeys …

Ashwini – 2 little …

Vansh – 10 little monkeys … (reminded me of the times when I tell him he’ll have to repeat a word he doesn’t remember 5 times, if he resists I go on increasing the number to 6,7,8 – its his turn now, hmm!)

Ashwini – Okay, lets just make it 2 little monkeys …

Vansh – 6 little monkeys jumping …

Chachi called the doctor …

Chacha called the doctor …

Dadi/Dada/ Papa/ Mamma called the doctor …

Us : Oh! So that was the logic behind the 6 jumping monkeys. Each one from the family ought to get a chance to call the doctor!

- I made him several worksheets for English, Hindi and Maths to practice matching the picture with the correct letter, circling the correct letter, counting and circling the correct number and the like. Many a times he liked to do his own thing with those.

This is what a typical worksheet on matching looked like. I couldn’t just give it to him and then proceed to check it some time later for that would be a maze exercise for me to see whether the picture is actually connected with the correct letter. I would have to actually look at him start from a particular picture, doodle endlessly and finally reach the corresponding letter. Normal is boring for this little fella!

He once didn’t want to work on any Maths worksheet because he was bored and said that he wanted to make one of his own. So he picked up a template and came up with this.

He made several English worksheets too at the back of the ones I gave to him to work on. I just have one picture though he made much better ones when the idea was novel to him and he drew meticulously.

The zig-zag matches with the Z, thats an umbrella matched with the U and a Race-car with the R. The big curve on the right is lots of smoke from the race car since it moves so fast.

He decided to spruce up a plain looking hurriedly made ‘What comes after’ worksheet by drawing an amusing looking Papa on it. And didn't deem the worksheet important enough to be completed, by the way.

- I am not sure if I have mentioned before that Vansh is extremely conscious of his public image, especially his image at school. I have a mighty hard time explaining that at home, he is the total opposite of the really the sweet docile boy that he pretends to be in front of friends. At PTM’s, when I and his class teacher (whom he is very very fond of and would do anything to be in her good books) exchange notes, I am like “Are you sure, you are talking about the same Vansh that I am talking about?” The difference shows in his work too. While his class work is immaculate and like his teacher claims among the first one to be finished, he likes to do his own thing taking his own time at home. On a regular basis, he does not write the counting in the correct order. He’ll first write say the 20’s line, then spend some time thinking where the 70 would come and then write the line backwards till 61 and so on. While practicing to draw a garden scene for his art test the next day, this is what he came up with at school and then at home. The school one is complete with a shining sun, trees and flowers and a bunny. He wanted to just make a big sun sitting in the garden and kept drawing rays of the sun.Then he wanted to draw a dog in its kennel which is what that square is.

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